NIGHT THREE

And on NIGHT THREE, Claudia Cohen created the Darty.

REWIND: NIGHT TWO

+ THE APES DARTY

Incredible weather and incredible tunes. We heard chill vibes to start, rap as the darty peaked out, and a tasteful selection of EDM to close.

OVERHEARD: "Nassau or Suffolk?"

+ MACHI + OAKS

A blissful backyard bash, packed to the breaking point with people. Tunes of the night framed delicately by nervous freshman girls scream-singing US Top 50.

OVERHEARD: "Play Mr. Brightside and I'll have your first born"

+ THE POOL PARTY DOWNTOWN

"Chozus" on the decks. No "THIS IS MY SONG" moments, but kept the party moving.

OVERHEARD: "Why is that girl wearing a bathing suit?"

+ LIONS

One hour and 23 minutes of absolute lit. House was deep. We dig deep house.

OVERHEARD: "Take a lap."

+ PHI

Great people, and even better music — no surprise at Phi. The phun didn't last long though, as Penn Police arrived in full force just as the party was peaking.

OVERHEARD: "Sorry officer, we're full right now — there are just too many of you to let in"

TONIGHT'S PLAYLIST: IT'S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA.

LISTEN ON SPOTIFY

ALOHA | møme

WEEKEND | louis the child

PURPLE CRAZE (REMIX) | heads2

CAN'T HIDE | whethan

GOLDEN | saint wknd x party pupils

OLD THING BACK | matoma x the notorious b.i.g

LOST AND FOUND | pretty lights x odesza

AFTERGOLD | big wild

SHELTER | porter robinson

FIREFLY | mura masa

HAPPENING:

2:00 PM | 233 S 41st

3:00 PM | 4004 Pine

10:00 PM | 4050 Spruce

10:30 PM | 3917 Delancey

THROWBACK STORY: MY KING, JOSH

"It was night #1. Not actually night one, it was the real night one; the first night of NSO that I had my life somewhat (sort of) together. Not that night one where I accidently stumbled into a frat house, only to be met with disdainful sneers and dirty looks. During the faux night one, I went out with kids from Jackson, Wyoming, Juneau, Alaska, and Scottsdale, Arizona (yikes). Us four clueless bozos had negative idea of where to go; shocker. Jaded and at my lowest, I was saved by a personal epiphany. Did you know, every Long island and Westchester kid knows everything about Penn before the even get here? Naturally, I gathered every Roslyn and Scarsdale kid I could find, and armed myself with the means to be a competent NSO-er.

The night began with a 30-man pregame jammed into a tiny Speakman first floor double. If you live there, I'm sorry, end-of. The star of the pregame was this kid, Josh. Josh knew everything. Rattling off foolproof plan after foolproof plan, he laid out our schedule for the night ahead with confidence and abandon. He addressed us like a seasoned actor, hands aloft and booming voice. It went something like this: "First, we're gonna go to APES, APES guys, APES is great... They are having a pregame for their late night. My boy, Zach, from camp will get us all (gesturing to the entire room) inside. Then, Theos is having their inaugural party. My dad's partner's son's friend's friend from camp is a junior, and we played golf once. Then, we'll hit Allegros (he then paused for dramatic effect). It becomes a scene around 1-2, and we'll hit it hard with a squad. Now, if that's not a night to remember, then I am sorry."

I would have followed this man to the end of the earth. I almost clapped.

In keeping to Josh's airtight schedule, we were off to our first pregame with a 15-strong brigade of 18 year old boys. Already quite drunk, in a haze of testosterone and loud breathing, we arrive. Huddling on the sidewalk, we wait as Josh ascends the steps to secure our entrance. What a guy. He makes a valiant effort, but Josh can't reach his first boy at the house; no big deal, this man has connects for days. Meanwhile, the sophomores working door are spewing line after line borrowed from the universal handbook The Frat Door : A Guide in Steps:

"Who do you know here?"

"What's your ratio? How many girls are with you? Oh... None?"

"I'm going to need you guys to circle for 15 minutes then try again."

So Josh may not have gotten us into the first frat, but there was no way that his Master Plan would take another hit. Josh shepherded his herd of lost freshmen to the next spot. We now stood at the threshold of the storied "Backlot". At this point, my theory on the frat door handbook was totally confirmed. We were bombarded by a barrage of familiar, unanswerable questions. However, my boy, the Scarsdale legend, emerged, like a triumphant greek hero, from the clueless mass. Making motions to call his boy, Josh's face falls as he removes his phone from his pocket and frantically presses the home button to absolutely no avail. Like our fledgling hopes and dreams for that evening, Josh's phone had died.

From the corner of 40th and Pine, the shining lights and linoleum flooring of Allegro's beckoned."

TIP OF THE DAY:

Josh has about as many connections as you do. Don't trust Josh.

SOMETHING DOPE:

Solid advice beyond NSO.